Sunday, January 9, 2011

Love, laziness, confusion, cravings, music -- Story of my life

Heyo everyone! This is my last Sunday of freedom, tomorrow back to school.. Im actually pretty excited about it, this is the first time in my whole life that I'm excited of going back to school.. it feels kinda nice :) Gosh I slept 14 hours.. FOURTEEN! hahahahaha I love sleeping, Im so not a morning person! Maybe that's the reason why I'm excited about my night classes, and not the morning ones, so yes, this is me during schooldays in the mornings --

I think that a daily activity in my life is what I really need to stop this messed up emotional roller coaster, I've been smoking like mad these days.. and my best friends are not helping.. AT ALL! Well no, in fact, its only one of them that is making everything worse.. You know when something not entirely great happens to you and you look at it in the most hopeful and comforting way, and then you decide to tell your experience to your friend and he manages to crush every hopeful feeling left in your small and vulnerable little heart? And he finishes his "statement" with - "I'm not sayin' this to make you feel bad, just open your eyes and face reality, she blindfolded you, you're unable to see reality, that is why I'm telling you this" well I'm like "screw you! You don't know her, you don't know us so you're not allowed to comment anything, 'cause I know that she's not blowing me off and that she's honest and all she needs is time!" Still.. you cant help to think things through, and get confused and go crazy!! I hate it when that happens! Friends are supposed to make you feel better! Be there for you! Not crushing your innocence and dreams!! It makes me mad.. ANYWAY! I'm glad to say that he was wrong, very glad actually, 'cause deep down I know that I'm gonna make it through with this girl with a lot of patience and a little sacrifice -I say sacrifice 'cause I've been like reeeeally, reeeaaaaally experiencing the need of feeling a girls body, its driving me nuts!! out of context - hahahahaha ok that's embarrassing.. Not really, I'm human, you're human, you know the feeling.. hahahaha anyhow, I'm truly enjoying this new experience, like, the feeling of knowing that everything's going to be ok and that all your efforts and patience and sacrifices will be worth the trouble.. this girl really blows my mind.. see, it is very different when you know the difference between sexual chemistry, and intellectual chemistry, I, for one, enjoy even more having an intellectual chemistry when I'm in the mood for settling down in a relationship.. Like with the other girls it was more a sexual chemistry.. we jumped off to bed right away and that makes you forget everything else, I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not an extremely sexual person, no, I'm more of.. let's talk, share opinions, point out differences, fight over some disagreement and kiss passionately to point out that differences are overrated, 'I love you for exactly who you are, I dont care about anything else, and I want you madly right now, you look so hot when you get mad' Now that's love :) hahahaha I may sound a little too crazy right now.. Anyway.. Yes hahaha this is mainly it..

I'm craving a hot cocoa like mad! See.. I love, LOVE, winter.. It's most definitely my favorite season, but the freaking holidays make me gain more pounds than I lost in the whole freaking year! I didn't do a bit of exercise, I just drank a lot of beer, ate like mad, smoked like mad, made everyday a lazy day, and my stuffed animals became my cuddling partners... LAME hahahaha, but tomorrow back to the exercise!! I'm pretty sure I lost all my condition.. Oh God, im in trouble.. Im gonna go now and make my hot cocoa! 'til next time peeps!


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